Hey, remember when I used to post loads of stupid Lotto photoshoots?


The €10m National Lottery midweek jackpot has been postponed until tonight after a technical problem stopped ticket machines working.

It is the first time in nearly 30 years of Lotto jackpots that a draw has been postponed.

OMG this means we are all going to win! OMG OMG! This is how excited I am right now:

Also, do not contact me to point out that the photoshoots are for the EuroMillions and not the Irish Lotto or I will send my aircraft carrying dog to hunt you down.

Cupid stunts



RTÉ’s Mary ‘Benjamin Button’ Kennedy and Marty ‘Martyred Saint’ Whelan abduct a child to celebrate St Valentine’s Day some time back. God be with the days when you could do this sort of thing, now the PC police would be all ‘child protection this’ and ‘WTF that’. Back in the 1990s you could buy a bouquet of posies and a naked human child for as little as one of your Irish púnts.