I cooked the noodles and I had chicken in the oven. I was waiting to put the chicken on the noodles. I went to the sitting room. I was watching telly. I went back into the kitchen to take my chicken out of the oven. I put my food on the table. I put the noodles in my mouth. The whole thing was liquid, it was soap.

A man named Lucky Hope tells his tale of woe in court. He said his wife then claimed the plate may have had washing-up residue on it.  

“I called the guards so the guards could come and see, to take things into my own hands,” Mr Hope, aged 39, of Banduff, Cork, testified at Cork District Court. 

Fair play. 

 

Author: Bill Linnane

Freelance writer - or 'word whore' - with the Irish Independent, Irish Examiner, Irish Tatler Man, Evening Echo, and Distilled. Proud owner of the award-defying TripleDistilled.Blog, Ireland's Least Successful Blog™.

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